what do we need?

Universal Human Needs

Needs, wants, likes, desires, longings. It's the life energy that runs through us wanting to be met. When I discovered the work of Marshall Rosenberg's nonviolent communication (NVC, cnvc.org) I was instantly affected in a profound way. Learning something that affects me in this way, I cannot stop myself from wanting to share it.

Needs are not required to be met in specific ways by certain people, in fact I would be cautious of this. When we take responsibility for our needs then the most magical experiences can occur. Acknowledging them alone can be helpful. Notice what happens in your body when you identify a need that you connect with as important for you right now. This is empathy, it helps us navigate towards understanding and when we understand we relax. I'm not talking about understanding in a cerebral way, I experience it as a truth that only my heart can know. When I get to this place I feel grounded, peaceful and ready to move into a new moment with clarity.

I'm wondering what's going on for you right now as you read this. What images does the word ‘need’ evoke in you? When you think about yourself having needs, what is your reaction? I often hear words like 'weak', 'selfish', 'guilty'. When you think about others having needs, what is your reaction?...

"If needs are, indeed, universal, then whenever we experience a need, we have something in common with all the people who also have that need. Although we may make different choices about strategies to meet the need, the experience of the need itself is common and similar to all of us. Every experience of having a need can be an opportunity to be in unity with the rest of humanity". (Miki Kashtan, thefearlessheart.org)

This understanding has brought me to a place of deep compassion and humility and I really can see myself in the other no matter how far apart our lifestyles appear to be. Needs are the compass of where I start and return to. Whenever I'm uncomfortable or wanting to be clear on my intention for making important decisions or when I'm working with clients I return to compassion and guess needs. It's where I go to re-navigate; an oasis in a sometimes challenging world. What do you need today? Take a look at the list and watch what happens...